It’s OK to cry: Finding hope when struggling with infertility and miscarriage, by Malcolm and Nick Cameron, is a very personal and painful book. It is not so much a book that objectively looks at the medical, psychological and spiritual aspects of infertility and miscarriage, but is rather an account of a personal journey with infertility, the joy of conception and then the devastation of miscarriage. Indeed, some of the book is written before the miscarriage and some 6 weeks later. This makes the book extremely honest, raw and difficult. At all times the book is written from an honest, Christian perspective that does not try to hide the difficulties and struggles.
You cannot read the book with dry eyes.
Nick explains why they wrote:
‘Malcolm and I talked long and hard about this book because we did’t want it to appear that we were telling others how to handle infertility and miscarriage. This book is merely our story, our experiences, and hopefully some of it will help you.‘
This book is worth reading if you are not infertile because:
-It gives you an insight into infertility that you would never otherwise have. Nick shares how she feels behind the smile and the closed doors.
-It will help you to learn what not to say, as well as give you help in knowing what to do.
This book is worth reading if you are struggling to concieve or have miscarried becuase:
-It may help you to see that you are not the only person feeling this way.
-That other Christians get angry and devastated too.
-There is a clear demonstration of the need for a strong marriage and honesty in the relationship to get through this.
This book is written honestly and bravely and I have all respect for the couple in being willing to write it. However, it is written from the midst of the storm and so some of their comments and thoughts may not be right. I felt particularly anxious that they were so against adoption and thought that was taking matters into their own hands, whilst fertility treatments was not. I’m not judging here, but just pointing out that they have a strong view that is not right for everyone. I guess, knowing the desperate need for Christians to adopt, and the fact that our Heavenly Father has adopted us, I wished they had at least been slightly more encouraging of it in the book.
However, I am glad they wrote the book, and glad I read it.
I would love to read a book by them in 20 years time. It would be great to see how God’s faithfulness has kept them and how they view certain issues after time.
Not an easy read, but a worthwhile one.
Here is the web site that goes with the book, hopewhenithurts.co.uk
You can buy the book here.